[ but, he reaches over and holds the teddy bear's hand out towards tobari. ]
But, you don't think you're worrying about the wrong thing? Instead of thinking someone is bothering me, you should be considering ways to cheer me up? [ why is tobari allowing this... ]
[ he looks at tobari's hand in which holds the bear's paws so delicately.
he tries not to break the seriousness of his own expression, however. ] ... That might be impossible. [ can he always ensure tobari will always keep his eyes on him? it seemed like an extreme demand even to him. he knows he has no reason to kick up such a fuss and yet.
so he decides to start this off a little differently. ]
[ he's not sure where this is going... he's trying to recall the photoshoot itself? did tobari miss some kind of cue from rafayel that he was uncomfortable? ]
The concept suited you well and you were polite to everyone on set. You took direction well, which made everything go smoothly. I think the director was pleased too, from our conversation.
he's quiet for a moment, before— ] So you were watching me? It didn't seem like it. You barely made eye contact, you didn't even try and approach me after the shoot, and you probably already forgot we were supposed to spend allll night together.
I was checking the gifts to make sure no one sent you anything insane. But of course I watch you—I always watch you. I still have to make sure that nothing weird or unsafe happens?
You and I both had to thank the staff, but then you avoided me at the tent where I was waiting for you? I offered to get you food because I knew we'd spend the evening together.
What the hell!
[ oKAY SO OBVIOUSLY HE DOESN'T THINK THIS TANTRUM IS VALID ]
[ he looks off to the side. ] I mean, part of why I worked so hard today was so that we could all finish early. [ he was looking forward to them spending time together... or so he seems to be implying as he's now grabbing the bear away from tobari like it's their child in the middle of their messy divorce. ]
[ rebuttals come easier to him. maybe that's why he's reflexively about to say something, but he stops short when he hears tobari's last words. he struggles top open his mouth for a second, but he does end up unbuckling his seatbelt and just leaning forward and against tobari's shoulder. ]
... I don't believe you. [ but, he does feel a little better.
despite the cautious way in which he's approached their relationship, it's true that he's recently been wanting to be a little closer. maybe all of this just really stemmed from his own insecurities. he can't help but wonder if tobari is dating him out of pity, or out of some weird sense of obligation (or worse, that they're not even dating at all... but he doesn't even think this is a possibility help). he knows they're bound by their professional relationship, and he's understanding of the fact that he can't exactly vocalize what they are to each other to the rest of the world, but in moments like this...
well, who doesn't want to be spoiled by their boyfriend? ] But, keep your eyes on me. I'm going to do all I can so you can enter an early retirement. So you have to do everything I want tonight.
[ . . . jeeze. tobari sighs, but doesn't shift away when rafayel leans forward and onto him. he shifts to make it easier for them to fit against each other, which surely only adds to how misleading this all is, but tobari just thinks that rafayel must be feeling especially needy... maybe he's anxious and demanding since their schedule is about to get insane with the comeback...
his hand comes up anyway, gently carding through rafayel's hair to try to soothe him. he just fixed it, and he'll have to fix it again before rafayel goes on live later today, but he'll deal with that when it comes... ]
I don't think I agreed to any of that... [ tobari has no idea what he'd do in retirement. go crazy, probably. but he understands the sentiment of what rafayel is asking so, ] Okay, okay. Get all your neediness out since there won't be room in the schedule for a while.
[ fair warning.... but also he frowns a bit as he feels like he has to say again, ]
... I know you work hard, Raf. I just want you to enjoy at least part of it while you're doing it. So don't push yourself too much. If there's ever something you hate, just tell me, and you won't have to do it. Even as much as I watch you, I can't read your mind, alright?
[ oh... is tobari holding him? he blinks, almost confused at first, but then he settles into his touch. he rests his chin on tobari's shoulder, and wraps his arms around him.
since they're so close, his voice naturally gets a little lower and quieter. ] I used to hate most of this stuff, but lately I've been having fun, and I think it's thanks to you. I didn't really think there was anything beyond the music itself...
[ but sometimes it's fun to perform. it was like an added element to his craft.
that said, he does pull away a little, just to kiss tobari on the cheek. it's so gently though, it could have just been the flutter of his hair. but, he's grateful he has someone who cares about him this much. ] But, I think sometimes I just really need this.
[ reassurance... except, it's not what he thinks it is at all. ]
[ what a big baby... tobari sighs, bringing his arms up to just give rafayel a hug entirely then. there's a slight grumble when the kiss comes—was it a kiss? he's not sure but it felt like an overly affectionate gesture that bordered on inappropriate. still, it's hard for him to impose distance with rafayel when he's already so moody and fragile... ]
... well, you're at your best when it's just you and the music. But this way, more people can hear it.
[ the things they have to do to promo the main event. commercials, lives, promo, fanservice... tobari is of the opinion that's how you get people in the door, but it's always raf's talent that gets them to stay rooted in place. ]
You can take a second whenever you want, though. [ the one thing tobari always hates is overworking the idols. even if a schedule is packed, it can still have just enough breathing room to not feel like a pressure chamber. ] So remember to use your words.
[ instead of throwing a fit that tobari can't figure out... they have time today but he's like this'd be such a mess for them both if they were busier ]
[ the lack of imposed distance... surely, that won't come back to bite him in the ass.
even with the slight grumble he hears so close to ears, he's still pleased that tobari hasn't pushed him away. instead, he remains in his arms, and somehow... it feels incredibly warm and comfortable to be there. eventually, he does untangle himself from tobari, if just to nod his head. ] You better not regret saying that.
I'm going to complain looots from now on. Especially, if I have to hit the gym as much as I did for this comeback. [ he's pretty sure running on the treadmill is 100% some form of torture. ... maybe tobari is into that. ]
[ except he wants to go home already and he's hungry so
he'll reach out with his other hand to catch rafayel by the hip, pulling him closer to tobari so he's sitting more toward his side on the backseat. then he'll use the hand on rafayel's abdomen to push him down so he's laying flat against the seat and tobari is hovering above him ]
This is harassment. Now let go.
[ thinking about how it's good the windows to this car are all completely tinted ]
for a moment, rafayel seems to go along with it, if just because he's being horribly misled. part of him (wrongly and inaccurately) believed this was tobari's way of giving in. soon he'd touch his abs and have no choice but to admit his body was better than yori's—
instead, he'd pushed on his back and he's stuck looking at tobari from underneath him. he blinks a few times. had they done this before, rafayel may have been more smug as opposed to...
he releases a sigh as he lets go of tobari, instead resting his hand on his leg. ]
... It's not harassment if I allow it. [ even if he might threaten to call someone the second tobari does. ]
[ rafayel like 'this isn't how the fanfics go, tobari is acting ooc rn'
but tobari just rolls his eyes then, reclaiming his hand once rafayel finally lets go and then using that to unceremoniously pinch rafayel's cheek. and pull. ]
Greedy.
[ ANNOYED. unfortunately he truly thinks that rafayel is just playing around with him so he's not even thinking twice about retaliating.... he'll pull back shortly after and then finally go to open the car door ]
If you're done messing around, buckle up. We're going home.
him taking notes so he knows what to leave on the fics he'd kudos'd. you know, before someone rudely pinches his cheek? hey? ] You're so mean... [ he rolls his eyes as he brushes tobari's hand off.
since his clothes are disheveled anyway, he does end up rummaging around the bag to pull out his extra clothes. he throws on an oversized hoodie, and puts his earbuds into his ears, so he can connect to his live in a bit.
... for now, he needs silence so he can pout. he feels led on... ]
[ WHY DID RAFAYEL JUST MENTALLY ASSIGN TOBARI AS A BOTTOM.....?
rafayel can go ahead and return back to silence. tobari heads back to the front seat and checks his phone briefly—and he also texts rafayel a short list of food options that he can pick up and bring back to the apartment if he's feeling tired. thai food, sushi, burrito? and he'll leave it at that so that a ) rafayel knows he's not ignoring his mood but also b ) he's leaving enough space for rafayel to be moody if he needs to actually decompress after working.
overly thoughtful tobari strikes again....
even if he has no recognition of the fact that he just baited rafayel so hard on accident. whoops ]
he's probably called tobari a meanie in his head like twenty times over the course of today, and yet he gets the feeling it probably won't end here. similarly, this probably isn't the first time tobari got this handsy with him, either. but, it may have been the first where he thought that maybe he was actually going to make his move.
per usual, it's ended in disappointment.
while he doesn't mind moving slow, and even he has his own ideals for how their first kiss will go, or how their first time should be... it didn't mean he also wasn't impatient and straight up insatiable when it came to tobari.
even now he peeks up at the back of his head. he ends up texting back. ]
wellll you know i like fish but you know what else i like
tobari drives them back to their apartment, though the text comes in when they make it to a stoplight and he automatically tilts his head about it. the first thing he does is send rafayel the takeout menu for the sushi place so that he can place an order ahead of time and maybe they can even pick it up on the way home but
also
????
out loud, because he doesn't text and drive: ] What's the hammer emoji for? Am I being threatened?
[ does rafayel have both headphones in... just one... can he even hear tobari ]
[ the fact that tobari is so accustomed to rafayel’s moods…
he’s also probably not wrong that he’s needed to decompress a lot after shoots in the past. it becoming better was likely a recent occurrence, only made better the more they’ve bonded. rafayel can’t help but be the kind of person who is entirely too absorbed when it came to love and relationships.
it’s why even with his earbuds in, he can still hear tobari’s voice clearly. he looks up at him from the backseat and he’s already typing in some of tobari’s favorite first before thinking about what he wants… hamachi, torched salmon…
the fact that tobari still can’t read emojis… does make him laugh a little. forget the fact that he tends to be cryptic and that’s half the problem. ]
How could I possibly threaten Mister Bodyguard? Instead of that, I think I should punish you a different way.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ but, he reaches over and holds the teddy bear's hand out towards tobari. ]
But, you don't think you're worrying about the wrong thing? Instead of thinking someone is bothering me, you should be considering ways to cheer me up? [ why is tobari allowing this... ]
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I can… but I’d still want to know what I did to upset you so I don’t do it again.
[ if it’s fair. if it’s not fair then… well he can take it into consideration just for the sake of being receptive to rafayel’s feelings ]
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he tries not to break the seriousness of his own expression, however. ] ... That might be impossible. [ can he always ensure tobari will always keep his eyes on him? it seemed like an extreme demand even to him. he knows he has no reason to kick up such a fuss and yet.
so he decides to start this off a little differently. ]
How did you think I did today?
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[ he's not sure where this is going... he's trying to recall the photoshoot itself? did tobari miss some kind of cue from rafayel that he was uncomfortable? ]
The concept suited you well and you were polite to everyone on set. You took direction well, which made everything go smoothly. I think the director was pleased too, from our conversation.
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...
he's quiet for a moment, before— ] So you were watching me? It didn't seem like it. You barely made eye contact, you didn't even try and approach me after the shoot, and you probably already forgot we were supposed to spend allll night together.
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I was checking the gifts to make sure no one sent you anything insane. But of course I watch you—I always watch you. I still have to make sure that nothing weird or unsafe happens?
You and I both had to thank the staff, but then you avoided me at the tent where I was waiting for you? I offered to get you food because I knew we'd spend the evening together.
What the hell!
[ oKAY SO OBVIOUSLY HE DOESN'T THINK THIS TANTRUM IS VALID ]
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[ he looks off to the side. ] I mean, part of why I worked so hard today was so that we could all finish early. [ he was looking forward to them spending time together... or so he seems to be implying as he's now grabbing the bear away from tobari like it's their child in the middle of their messy divorce. ]
Was I the only one who was excited?
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reaches over to pinch rafayel's cheek to scold him ]
Don't call doing my job excuses.
[ SIGHS ]
You did well then... [ to make the shoot resolve early ] but of course I'm glad you'd get a chance to rest before we start getting busier tomorrow.
Did you think I wasn't paying attention to you...? Raf, I'm always paying attention to you. I don't know how to not notice you anymore.
[ in a mysteriously platonic way, it feels like rafayel's at the center of tobari's universe most days. ]
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... I don't believe you. [ but, he does feel a little better.
despite the cautious way in which he's approached their relationship, it's true that he's recently been wanting to be a little closer. maybe all of this just really stemmed from his own insecurities. he can't help but wonder if tobari is dating him out of pity, or out of some weird sense of obligation (or worse, that they're not even dating at all... but he doesn't even think this is a possibility help). he knows they're bound by their professional relationship, and he's understanding of the fact that he can't exactly vocalize what they are to each other to the rest of the world, but in moments like this...
well, who doesn't want to be spoiled by their boyfriend? ] But, keep your eyes on me. I'm going to do all I can so you can enter an early retirement. So you have to do everything I want tonight.
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his hand comes up anyway, gently carding through rafayel's hair to try to soothe him. he just fixed it, and he'll have to fix it again before rafayel goes on live later today, but he'll deal with that when it comes... ]
I don't think I agreed to any of that... [ tobari has no idea what he'd do in retirement. go crazy, probably. but he understands the sentiment of what rafayel is asking so, ] Okay, okay. Get all your neediness out since there won't be room in the schedule for a while.
[ fair warning.... but also he frowns a bit as he feels like he has to say again, ]
... I know you work hard, Raf. I just want you to enjoy at least part of it while you're doing it. So don't push yourself too much. If there's ever something you hate, just tell me, and you won't have to do it. Even as much as I watch you, I can't read your mind, alright?
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since they're so close, his voice naturally gets a little lower and quieter. ] I used to hate most of this stuff, but lately I've been having fun, and I think it's thanks to you. I didn't really think there was anything beyond the music itself...
[ but sometimes it's fun to perform. it was like an added element to his craft.
that said, he does pull away a little, just to kiss tobari on the cheek. it's so gently though, it could have just been the flutter of his hair. but, he's grateful he has someone who cares about him this much. ] But, I think sometimes I just really need this.
[ reassurance... except, it's not what he thinks it is at all. ]
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... well, you're at your best when it's just you and the music. But this way, more people can hear it.
[ the things they have to do to promo the main event. commercials, lives, promo, fanservice... tobari is of the opinion that's how you get people in the door, but it's always raf's talent that gets them to stay rooted in place. ]
You can take a second whenever you want, though. [ the one thing tobari always hates is overworking the idols. even if a schedule is packed, it can still have just enough breathing room to not feel like a pressure chamber. ] So remember to use your words.
[ instead of throwing a fit that tobari can't figure out... they have time today but he's like this'd be such a mess for them both if they were busier ]
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even with the slight grumble he hears so close to ears, he's still pleased that tobari hasn't pushed him away. instead, he remains in his arms, and somehow... it feels incredibly warm and comfortable to be there. eventually, he does untangle himself from tobari, if just to nod his head. ] You better not regret saying that.
I'm going to complain looots from now on. Especially, if I have to hit the gym as much as I did for this comeback. [ he's pretty sure running on the treadmill is 100% some form of torture. ... maybe tobari is into that. ]
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If you're trying to do more suggestive shoots, you'll probably have to be at the gym plenty... That's a lot of skin, you know?
[ all this to what? compete with yori? horrible. tobari just frowns and pulls back once rafayel's hair is fully immaculate ]
The only thing you have left today is to go live... so you can do that when we're driving back or while I'm ordering food. Up to you.
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excuse him??? ] Heeeello! I have abs?
[ he's already beginning to pull up his shirt. he grabs tobari's hand and draws it closer until his palms are flat against his body. ] See, feel them!
[ forget about the live!!! this is more important!!
will his hair end up a mess again... stay tuned. ]
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ALREADY TRYING TO PULL HIS HAND BACK ]
Can you stop harassing me.
[ they just had a sweet and tender moment and it immediately devolves into stupidity again ]
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not them wrestling in the car ]
You have to really look and feel or I'm not moving!
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Nothing about me started harassing you.
[ except he wants to go home already and he's hungry so
he'll reach out with his other hand to catch rafayel by the hip, pulling him closer to tobari so he's sitting more toward his side on the backseat. then he'll use the hand on rafayel's abdomen to push him down so he's laying flat against the seat and tobari is hovering above him ]
This is harassment. Now let go.
[ thinking about how it's good the windows to this car are all completely tinted ]
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for a moment, rafayel seems to go along with it, if just because he's being horribly misled. part of him (wrongly and inaccurately) believed this was tobari's way of giving in. soon he'd touch his abs and have no choice but to admit his body was better than yori's—
instead, he'd pushed on his back and he's stuck looking at tobari from underneath him. he blinks a few times. had they done this before, rafayel may have been more smug as opposed to...
he releases a sigh as he lets go of tobari, instead resting his hand on his leg. ]
... It's not harassment if I allow it. [ even if he might threaten to call someone the second tobari does. ]
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but tobari just rolls his eyes then, reclaiming his hand once rafayel finally lets go and then using that to unceremoniously pinch rafayel's cheek. and pull. ]
Greedy.
[ ANNOYED. unfortunately he truly thinks that rafayel is just playing around with him so he's not even thinking twice about retaliating.... he'll pull back shortly after and then finally go to open the car door ]
If you're done messing around, buckle up. We're going home.
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him taking notes so he knows what to leave on the fics he'd kudos'd. you know, before someone rudely pinches his cheek? hey? ] You're so mean... [ he rolls his eyes as he brushes tobari's hand off.
since his clothes are disheveled anyway, he does end up rummaging around the bag to pull out his extra clothes. he throws on an oversized hoodie, and puts his earbuds into his ears, so he can connect to his live in a bit.
... for now, he needs silence so he can pout. he feels led on... ]
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rafayel can go ahead and return back to silence. tobari heads back to the front seat and checks his phone briefly—and he also texts rafayel a short list of food options that he can pick up and bring back to the apartment if he's feeling tired. thai food, sushi, burrito? and he'll leave it at that so that a ) rafayel knows he's not ignoring his mood but also b ) he's leaving enough space for rafayel to be moody if he needs to actually decompress after working.
overly thoughtful tobari strikes again....
even if he has no recognition of the fact that he just baited rafayel so hard on accident. whoops ]
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he's probably called tobari a meanie in his head like twenty times over the course of today, and yet he gets the feeling it probably won't end here. similarly, this probably isn't the first time tobari got this handsy with him, either. but, it may have been the first where he thought that maybe he was actually going to make his move.
per usual, it's ended in disappointment.
while he doesn't mind moving slow, and even he has his own ideals for how their first kiss will go, or how their first time should be... it didn't mean he also wasn't impatient and straight up insatiable when it came to tobari.
even now he peeks up at the back of his head. he ends up texting back. ]
wellll you know i like fish
but you know what else i like
people who know how to follow thruuu 😒🔨
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tobari drives them back to their apartment, though the text comes in when they make it to a stoplight and he automatically tilts his head about it. the first thing he does is send rafayel the takeout menu for the sushi place so that he can place an order ahead of time and maybe they can even pick it up on the way home but
also
????
out loud, because he doesn't text and drive: ] What's the hammer emoji for? Am I being threatened?
[ does rafayel have both headphones in... just one... can he even hear tobari ]
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he’s also probably not wrong that he’s needed to decompress a lot after shoots in the past. it becoming better was likely a recent occurrence, only made better the more they’ve bonded. rafayel can’t help but be the kind of person who is entirely too absorbed when it came to love and relationships.
it’s why even with his earbuds in, he can still hear tobari’s voice clearly. he looks up at him from the backseat and he’s already typing in some of tobari’s favorite first before thinking about what he wants… hamachi, torched salmon…
the fact that tobari still can’t read emojis… does make him laugh a little. forget the fact that he tends to be cryptic and that’s half the problem. ]
How could I possibly threaten Mister Bodyguard? Instead of that, I think I should punish you a different way.
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