[ the hand to his cheek does successfully manage to shake him from his thoughts temporarily. he peers back at him, and releases a soft sigh. as their lips come together, he also can't help but lick the corner of his lips before pressing them together once more. when he pulls away, he can't help but find tobari's attempt at being bossy... really endearing. he knows tobari's words probably stem from concern. after all, he tended to be incredibly perceptive at times like these...
sometimes rafayel feels like tobari reads through his moods so easily. ]
That's the plan. Besides, I think there are lots of sights you can only see here too. [ ... ]
[ after opening up so much of your heart to someone, it's probably a little bit more obvious when they're holding something back. tobari's sure that rafayel feels the exact same way when he also guards his own secrets, given how rare they are to begin with. like a barrier that wasn't there before. those are the thoughts that linger for him as he idly lets his nose brush against raf's cheek, staying close for just a second after the kisses are over ]
Mm. Sure. You said you went to school around here, right? How many years were you here anyway...?
[ but he'll turn in raf's arms once he's done putting the cleaning rag down, arms circling around his neck in turn. he tilts his head, curious, but also once again studying raf's expression ]
[ he feels tobari's gaze on him. normally, he liked being studied. he enjoyed the way their eyes would meet, and appreciated that in moments like these they were genuinely trying to understand one another. it was almost like they were both attempting to fill in invisible gaps to a glass of water that was already halfway full, as if they both believed they could salvage it all. ... and maybe together they could. he feels a certain warmth, and it isn't just from the kiss they share. it makes it difficult for him to remain in his melancholy, and there's a slight shift as he tries to remain a bit more lighthearted. ]
It felt like centuries, honestly? But, maybe just two or three years? It wasn't very long. Long enough for the roads to become familiar, but where... it's not really home, yeah. Are you really that curious about me as a student?
[ he brushes a finger right beneath tobari's eyelashes. ]
[ he's still under raf's touch, letting his fingertip roam as he wants, not flinching away from the touch or his gaze. ]
Maybe? Who wouldn't be? [ curious about what their lover was like growing up, though tobari can also make a joke, ] Though it makes me wonder if we would've gotten along if we met when we were younger.
[ every group of friends that meets later in life but is like 'do you think we would've been friends in high school' and the answer is almost always no ]
Suzune and I moved around growing up... but we never left the city. [ they were shuffled from home to home for different reasons ] So I can't say I know what it's like.
[ the thought gets a little laugh out of rafayel. he'd personally like to think they would. that it would be like lovers reuniting before they've ever even met; almost as if it were fate, and maybe it is, if just because rafayel couldn't have imagined falling for anyone else. he also gets the feeling that tobari has a hard time leaving those who appear like they're struggling alone... so maybe they still would have met, and like clockwork, their feelings would have bud in a similar fashion.
or he's just a cagefisher. ]
I think so. You still wouldn't be able to take your eyes off me. [ he says with a shrug, before nodding along. ]
And I'm the same. [ ... ] What else? What were you like when you were younger? For some reason, I can't picture you as anything, but overly responsible and hardworking. I get the feeling you were practically born with that one expression you always make.
[ he presses a finger playfully between tobari's brows.
[ rafayel is so sweet and sentimental while tobari is thinking about how if they were assigned to a group project together, raf would get on his nerves so bad and tobari would have to take lead on most of the work but at least they'd have the most beautifully designed poster presentation in class
speaking of that one expression, he's making it now as his brows furrow with the tap and then he lightly shakes his head just to dislodge raf's finger ]
You can ask Suzune. She'd say something about how I was overprotective and fussy... [ but their childhood isn't all that fun to talk about, given that tobari probably got put to work from a young age just to make end's meet. ] But even I was a kid, you know?
[ in theory. but he'll give raf a quick kiss on the cheek before lightly nudging him away—tobari normally doesn't have a problem with just standing around and chatting away while sticking close to each other, but he's hungry.... he doesn't sleep on a normal schedule but he does eat ]
[ they would be so set on visuals, it's true. he would probably also be decent at presenting information. you know, at the expense of tobari having to wrangle him under strict deadlines while rafayel simultaneously derails them both with a promises of a coffee date.
when tobari shakes his head beneath his finger, he ends up dropping it back to his side, though not without a slight pout of his lips. ] ... As in you were a troublemaker? [ that also wouldn't surprise rafayel. tobari had a bit of rebellious streak in him. he was the type who seemed to place himself on the backburner as long as it meant he could serve those in his close proximity. or even some higher, more elusive goal they've likely only talked about in passing between all his projects.
that said, he does smile a little at the kiss. he's already dusting his own hands off, so he can start leading them towards the dinner venue.
(for the record, he is absolutely going to ask suzune for the scoops.)
before, that, he does end up grabbing tobari by the wrist. ]
Then, are you going to change into the outfit I packed for you?
[ he can wear his all white wedding outfit i guess. why did i suddenly noncon you into this ]
[ which is to say he picked fights with bullies and assholes. but also tobari did probably cause mischief here and there, so long as it didn't hurt anybody. suzune would probably talk about this more, the way that tobari would come back with scrapes and bruises and not explain why...
though at the question, he's just tilting his head ]
You want me to wear white to dinner? Is this a test? I thought it was for tomorrow.
[ YOU REALLY SUDDENLY BROUGHT THIS UP. the idea of tobari being stuck in all white while rafayel is having an assassin moment is also funny. imagine he gets blood on it. that's aesthetic and sexy ]
[ he says this as he's pulling tobari towards their suitcases. ] Oh, yeah. You do need that for tomorrow. [ he says with a brief smile on his lips as he's leaning down and grabbing a new shirt for himself, and for tobari... his hand lingers over some of tobari's clothes.
this is why tobari should have left him buy like... all five options? but, you're right, white needs to be saved for tomorrow's festivities. :)
for now, rafayel grabs another black shirt out of tobari's pile. ] Don't you think it feels more vacation-y? [ i wish i could be more insane and it's the catch 22 outfits. but not even rafayel is crazy enough to suggest that... ]
[ THE BDSM OUTFITS? the way tobari honestly doesn't mind getting told what to wear, he just hates excess so five options is too many.... his closet probably has a bunch of varying statement pieces and hand me downs from his neesans. there's no way that he's a boring dresser but even he probably wouldn't do the insane bdsm outfits for a random dinner ]
What am I, your dress-up doll...?
[ but he'll take it anyway. they're the only ones here so he doesn't care about just starting to shrug off the shirt he's already wearing after undoing whatever fasten held it shut ]
We live beachside, I'm not sure if anything gets more naturally luxurious than that.
but, at his words, he does give an almost sly smile. ] You only noticed now? [ when he's undoing his shirt, rafayel is already smoothing out the fabric of the shirt tobari's about to put on. he stands directly in front of him and he delicately slides his hands over tobari's chest. he establishes eye contact briefly, before giving a playful huff of humor. at least, he quickly gives up and begins dutifully buttoning him up, not unlike he was his butler.
does tobari get the feeling butler roleplay will commence, because he should. ]
So that's what the Young Master of the house thinks?
tobari gives raf a briefly exhausted look, but fine—he'll still take this over the melancholy, so he'll briefly play along. when raf helps him out, he'll lift his own arms to rest lightly over raf's shoulders. the fingers on his right hand idly card through raf's hair, an excuse to touch him as he gets helped with getting dressed. the role reversal of this is hilarious when some days tobari thinks raf is richer than god....
for some reason he thinks of his friend awayuki who can't reasonably be a butler in this au but is probably hinagiku's personal assistant? ]
Even this Young Master knows when to count his blessings. [ this is already ooc because no rich person is ever as grateful as tobari ] What more could I want besides the sea and you?
[ tries to think of what rich people like ]
Maybe a yacht? A fourth house I don't use? Gold leaf tissues?
the steady contact on his shoulders is comforting in a way, and it takes a bit of effort for him not to slip out of his self-imposed butler role. he keeps his expression perfectly even, though the touch of mirth that reaches his eyes are probably obvious enough. once tobari is perfectly buttoned up, he flips the collar of his shirt upwards, and also grabs a dark red tie that he's set on one of the bedside tables. he gently places it around tobari's neck, he does use it to nudge tobari a little closer, as if testing how much he can get away with. in a way, he feels like he's looking at one of his canvases. the care and the artistry behind his touch is no different, at least. ]
You don't think that last one falls a bit short...? But if our spoiled little prince wants it, he gets it... [ is there any butler out there who could boldly declare his master is spoiled? probably not. but, since tobari isn't actually spoiled... surely it cancels out.
that said, he does end up plucking a gold tie clip with a single diamond on it from his pocket, and clips it in the space between the two buttons. ]
[ hinagiku picks out clothes for them both but then awayuki helps her get ready in the morning including doing her hair...
tobari tilts his head, obviously confused at the idea of gold leaf tissues falling short. isn't that the most wasteful thing in the world? why put gold on something that would just disappear? except rafayel is picking out a gold tie clip with a goddamn diamond in it and tobari is trying to keep his expression steady so he bites back a comment on this being too fucking much! raf!!!! okay so maybe tobari has an incorrect idea of how much gold is worth at all!!!
rich people................... ]
... lucky me? [ this is killing him, he can't larp a spoiled rich boy well at all ] ... you sure this isn't overkill?
[ he really couldn't keep himself from commenting on the diamond ]
though, rafayel draws the line at denying the tie clip. to be honest, he would have commissioned him something a little more personal, but it fits their purposes for tonight. besides, this is just for when they go out. actually, maybe he still could commission him something once they get back. he pockets the idea for their next outing. as for tonight, and the following night... well, he'd rather not associate the memories to something they may hold onto forever.
it's so clear what tobari is thinking, and he can't help the touch of humor that weaves into his voice as he speaks. ]
As the only heir to the late Master, doesn't this much only make sense? [ once he's done pushing his tie up, his fingers settle on it, letting this knuckles graze the warmth tobari's body exudes, and just like that he ends up breaking character as he presses a chaste kiss on tobari's cheek. ]
[ thinking about how if rafayel forced a tie on him this is probably a rare instance where tobari's buttoned up all the way and his tattoos aren't just out. he might even look halfway docile if not for the all the piercings.
anyway he's giving up entirely on the rp now with the kiss, like a spell being broken, and will instead just loop his arms around rafayel's neck to draw him closer. raising a brow, he teases ]
Yeah, I'd hire you. You even convinced me into thinking that you're well-behaved. That's practically a miracle.
[ with that said, ]
Still think the tie clip's over the top though. You know I don't need things like this, right?
[ jewels and gems and gifts... he'll accept them because he doesn't ever want rafayel's sentiments to go to waste, but still. ]
[ that's exactly what i was thinking this whole time... like this is ooc for tobari, i'm sorry.
seeing tobari look a little different than usual, he can't help but be a little endeared at the sight. regardless, he feels like anything would look good on tobari, even catch 22 bondage gear but this thread is not about that. ] Thinking? I'd say I am pretty well-behaved, aren't I?
[ he's a good, honest boy... ]
You might not need it now, but in fifty years when you have a memory shorter than a goldfish's, you're going to thank me. [ then everything around them could act as some sort of reminder... or that's what he'd like to believe at least. ]
[ makes a noncommittal noise... is rafayel well-behaved... hm... well....
but tobari just frowns at the idea ]
I'd remember you. [ baseless confidence that even if he forgot everything else, he'd still remember rafayel. ] But you could give me anything and I'd hold onto it. You don't need to make it expensive.
[ tobari would keep seashells or small cards or anything at all. ]
[ the conviction in his words does end up moving him, even if there's absolutely zero backing to his statement. after all, who could predict the future? but in spite of this, he finds himself desperately wanting to believe in those words. ]
But they last longer...? Besides, the more wasteful you think it is, maybe that bitterness will follow you even when we're born again? [ why is he treating tobari like he'd be a spiteful apparition... in reality, that would be more like raf.
but, he belatedly feels like his statement felt a bit too intense for the moment and so he downplays it by touching the side of tobari's neck. he pads along the side where his pulse is, then he places his fingers against his adam's apple, staring at it for a moment before looking away. ]
[ rafayel thinking that what he said was too intense and so he decides to accompany it with a gesture that also seems to be a bit intense. even still, tobari just tilts his head slightly with the touch, brow furrowing just a bit in his confusion. generally, he'll accept any touch from rafayel—he's earned that right from him—but some of these almost feel like... they're trying to communicate something that words can't quite convey.
so tobari just brings up a hand to lightly catch the one that had grazed over his neck, lifting rafayel's hand so that tobari can press his lips lightly against those wandering fingertips. almost as if trying to answer what was left unsaid. ]
Sometimes you do drive me slightly crazy. [ he'll admit to that. rafayel ragebaits tobari on purpose and he gets caught every time. ] But I think in our next life, it'll be everything else you make me feel that'll drive me to you.
And if that fails, we can say I'll find you out of spite.
[ he turns rafayel's hand over in his hold, pressing another kiss to his palm before lowering it ]
[ the fact that he doesn't push him away is both comforting and... quite frankly, frightening at the same time.
rafayel isn't afraid of spilling his secrets, or showcasing his vulnerabilities. but, he was scared of tobari coming to hate who he actually was. or if he'd wake up one day and decided he couldn't handle the weight of rafayel's feelings. no matter how much reassurance he's received, he isn't sure if these thoughts of his would ever change.
... and he feels it stronger with every second. even knowing that he brought tobari here specifically for the purpose of sharing his world with him, it hasn't been easy. it's why it felt a little dishonest to accept tobari's heartfelt words. they read like a confession, and while it makes his heart flutter, it also burns him in the same breath. he inhales tightly at the feel of tobari's warmth on his fingertips, and his fingers curl instinctively, holding onto his hand. ]
As much as I look forward to your spite, I do have one complaint. [ ... ]
You're already making me sound like a troublemaker again.
You are a troublemaker. [ decisively. there's no way around that one, unfortunately
still, tobari will let his free hand slip to the back of rafayel's neck to encourage him down for a kiss anyway. when tobari pulls back, his expression softens into something fond. ]
But you're my troublemaker. So don't get so lost in your thoughts... but if you do, I'll just pull you back to me again.
[ and he'll press a kiss to rafayel's left cheek, right cheek, and linger briefly to nose at his jawline—a little overly affectionate, but still determined to not let this feeling of melancholy win ]
So the kiss was a spell this whole time, huh? [ ( purgastory voice ) why would there be a sex spell. but, it does succeed in drawing him back out from his thoughts. it was a physical reminder that maybe it was okay to trust in tobari's devotion. that their bond was deeper than his sins.
he finishes putting on his belt, before he ends up grabbing tobari's hand and heading out the door. he'd make a joke about tobari will need to eat to survive the next day, but he inwardly realizes... that's probably not very funny, and so he doesn't end up saying it.
...
they can hail a taxi there, i guess, since they may just be running late to their reservation.
the restaurant is a both quaint and upscale at the same time, almost carrying a more rustic vibe. while the menu is limited, the dishes they bring out are nothing short of beautiful; the seafood not only fresh, but incredibly well-seasoned and balanced.
but, maybe what sticks out more than the food is its owners. for one, it's probably the first time rafayel has been called with such familiarity by other people in a public capacity. they seem keen on treating rafayel like he's an overgrown kid, including calling him "lil raf." which is cursed because it only makes me think of that quiz...
that's not the most attractive, though, and so he's definitely looking for the first indication that tobari is done with his food so they can finally leave.
he even presses his foot on top of tobari's under the dinner table to drive that point.
[ you did it so i could enjoy the idea of raf being aggressively babied by the shop owners... this is so cute... tobari is having the time of his life as well. normally he's a perfectly fine level of distant whenever they go out places, more polite to the waitstaff than any other patron, but watching the owners interact soooooo familiarly with rafayel actually makes his amusement come much easier. there's a curve to his mouth that's harder to dispel, eyes bright every time he gets called "lil raf"......
tobari might've finished his food, but raf's eagerness to leave has him feeling contrary. after the tap to his foot, he instead lifts it to let it drag lightly against rafayel's calf before hooking around his ankle. footsie. ]
What, we can't get dessert?
[ he supposes they can find another spot somewhere nearby but... this is fun for him?
which is likely why, rafayel appears to be awkwardly trying to combat their embarrassing stories by waving them off. though, after the fifth or sixth time of doing this, he is definitely being worn down. if there's one consolation, it's in the fact that tobari seems to be enjoying himself. there isn't a lot he wouldn't endure to see him smile.
... and maybe the feeling of tobari's foot against his ankle. he tries not to show he's startled. he clear his throat, before trying to shake tobari's foot off. shifting his position a little, he tries to trap tobari's foot between his feet. ] If you keep this up, there won't be dessert from here or anywhere.
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sometimes rafayel feels like tobari reads through his moods so easily. ]
That's the plan. Besides, I think there are lots of sights you can only see here too. [ ... ]
We can even walk around after we eat.
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Mm. Sure. You said you went to school around here, right? How many years were you here anyway...?
[ but he'll turn in raf's arms once he's done putting the cleaning rag down, arms circling around his neck in turn. he tilts his head, curious, but also once again studying raf's expression ]
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It felt like centuries, honestly? But, maybe just two or three years? It wasn't very long. Long enough for the roads to become familiar, but where... it's not really home, yeah. Are you really that curious about me as a student?
[ he brushes a finger right beneath tobari's eyelashes. ]
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Maybe? Who wouldn't be? [ curious about what their lover was like growing up, though tobari can also make a joke, ] Though it makes me wonder if we would've gotten along if we met when we were younger.
[ every group of friends that meets later in life but is like 'do you think we would've been friends in high school' and the answer is almost always no ]
Suzune and I moved around growing up... but we never left the city. [ they were shuffled from home to home for different reasons ] So I can't say I know what it's like.
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or he's just a cagefisher. ]
I think so. You still wouldn't be able to take your eyes off me. [ he says with a shrug, before nodding along. ]
And I'm the same. [ ... ] What else? What were you like when you were younger? For some reason, I can't picture you as anything, but overly responsible and hardworking. I get the feeling you were practically born with that one expression you always make.
[ he presses a finger playfully between tobari's brows.
he's kidding. he loves it. ]
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speaking of that one expression, he's making it now as his brows furrow with the tap and then he lightly shakes his head just to dislodge raf's finger ]
You can ask Suzune. She'd say something about how I was overprotective and fussy... [ but their childhood isn't all that fun to talk about, given that tobari probably got put to work from a young age just to make end's meet. ] But even I was a kid, you know?
[ in theory. but he'll give raf a quick kiss on the cheek before lightly nudging him away—tobari normally doesn't have a problem with just standing around and chatting away while sticking close to each other, but he's hungry.... he doesn't sleep on a normal schedule but he does eat ]
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when tobari shakes his head beneath his finger, he ends up dropping it back to his side, though not without a slight pout of his lips. ] ... As in you were a troublemaker? [ that also wouldn't surprise rafayel. tobari had a bit of rebellious streak in him. he was the type who seemed to place himself on the backburner as long as it meant he could serve those in his close proximity. or even some higher, more elusive goal they've likely only talked about in passing between all his projects.
that said, he does smile a little at the kiss. he's already dusting his own hands off, so he can start leading them towards the dinner venue.
(for the record, he is absolutely going to ask suzune for the scoops.)
before, that, he does end up grabbing tobari by the wrist. ]
Then, are you going to change into the outfit I packed for you?
[ he can wear his all white wedding outfit i guess. why did i suddenly noncon you into this ]
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[ which is to say he picked fights with bullies and assholes. but also tobari did probably cause mischief here and there, so long as it didn't hurt anybody. suzune would probably talk about this more, the way that tobari would come back with scrapes and bruises and not explain why...
though at the question, he's just tilting his head ]
You want me to wear white to dinner? Is this a test? I thought it was for tomorrow.
[ YOU REALLY SUDDENLY BROUGHT THIS UP. the idea of tobari being stuck in all white while rafayel is having an assassin moment is also funny. imagine he gets blood on it. that's aesthetic and sexy ]
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[ he says this as he's pulling tobari towards their suitcases. ] Oh, yeah. You do need that for tomorrow. [ he says with a brief smile on his lips as he's leaning down and grabbing a new shirt for himself, and for tobari... his hand lingers over some of tobari's clothes.
this is why tobari should have left him buy like... all five options? but, you're right, white needs to be saved for tomorrow's festivities. :)
for now, rafayel grabs another black shirt out of tobari's pile. ] Don't you think it feels more vacation-y? [ i wish i could be more insane and it's the catch 22 outfits. but not even rafayel is crazy enough to suggest that... ]
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What am I, your dress-up doll...?
[ but he'll take it anyway. they're the only ones here so he doesn't care about just starting to shrug off the shirt he's already wearing after undoing whatever fasten held it shut ]
We live beachside, I'm not sure if anything gets more naturally luxurious than that.
[ just pointing that out, ]
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but, at his words, he does give an almost sly smile. ] You only noticed now? [ when he's undoing his shirt, rafayel is already smoothing out the fabric of the shirt tobari's about to put on. he stands directly in front of him and he delicately slides his hands over tobari's chest. he establishes eye contact briefly, before giving a playful huff of humor. at least, he quickly gives up and begins dutifully buttoning him up, not unlike he was his butler.
does tobari get the feeling butler roleplay will commence, because he should. ]
So that's what the Young Master of the house thinks?
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tobari gives raf a briefly exhausted look, but fine—he'll still take this over the melancholy, so he'll briefly play along. when raf helps him out, he'll lift his own arms to rest lightly over raf's shoulders. the fingers on his right hand idly card through raf's hair, an excuse to touch him as he gets helped with getting dressed. the role reversal of this is hilarious when some days tobari thinks raf is richer than god....
for some reason he thinks of his friend awayuki who can't reasonably be a butler in this au but is probably hinagiku's personal assistant? ]
Even this Young Master knows when to count his blessings. [ this is already ooc because no rich person is ever as grateful as tobari ] What more could I want besides the sea and you?
[ tries to think of what rich people like ]
Maybe a yacht? A fourth house I don't use? Gold leaf tissues?
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the steady contact on his shoulders is comforting in a way, and it takes a bit of effort for him not to slip out of his self-imposed butler role. he keeps his expression perfectly even, though the touch of mirth that reaches his eyes are probably obvious enough. once tobari is perfectly buttoned up, he flips the collar of his shirt upwards, and also grabs a dark red tie that he's set on one of the bedside tables. he gently places it around tobari's neck, he does use it to nudge tobari a little closer, as if testing how much he can get away with. in a way, he feels like he's looking at one of his canvases. the care and the artistry behind his touch is no different, at least. ]
You don't think that last one falls a bit short...? But if our spoiled little prince wants it, he gets it... [ is there any butler out there who could boldly declare his master is spoiled? probably not. but, since tobari isn't actually spoiled... surely it cancels out.
that said, he does end up plucking a gold tie clip with a single diamond on it from his pocket, and clips it in the space between the two buttons. ]
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tobari tilts his head, obviously confused at the idea of gold leaf tissues falling short. isn't that the most wasteful thing in the world? why put gold on something that would just disappear? except rafayel is picking out a gold tie clip with a goddamn diamond in it and tobari is trying to keep his expression steady so he bites back a comment on this being too fucking much! raf!!!! okay so maybe tobari has an incorrect idea of how much gold is worth at all!!!
rich people................... ]
... lucky me? [ this is killing him, he can't larp a spoiled rich boy well at all ] ... you sure this isn't overkill?
[ he really couldn't keep himself from commenting on the diamond ]
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not the gold that disappears. but, he's right.
though, rafayel draws the line at denying the tie clip. to be honest, he would have commissioned him something a little more personal, but it fits their purposes for tonight. besides, this is just for when they go out. actually, maybe he still could commission him something once they get back. he pockets the idea for their next outing. as for tonight, and the following night... well, he'd rather not associate the memories to something they may hold onto forever.
it's so clear what tobari is thinking, and he can't help the touch of humor that weaves into his voice as he speaks. ]
As the only heir to the late Master, doesn't this much only make sense? [ once he's done pushing his tie up, his fingers settle on it, letting this knuckles graze the warmth tobari's body exudes, and just like that he ends up breaking character as he presses a chaste kiss on tobari's cheek. ]
How would you rate your butler's service?
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anyway he's giving up entirely on the rp now with the kiss, like a spell being broken, and will instead just loop his arms around rafayel's neck to draw him closer. raising a brow, he teases ]
Yeah, I'd hire you. You even convinced me into thinking that you're well-behaved. That's practically a miracle.
[ with that said, ]
Still think the tie clip's over the top though. You know I don't need things like this, right?
[ jewels and gems and gifts... he'll accept them because he doesn't ever want rafayel's sentiments to go to waste, but still. ]
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seeing tobari look a little different than usual, he can't help but be a little endeared at the sight. regardless, he feels like anything would look good on tobari, even catch 22 bondage gear but this thread is not about that. ] Thinking? I'd say I am pretty well-behaved, aren't I?
[ he's a good, honest boy... ]
You might not need it now, but in fifty years when you have a memory shorter than a goldfish's, you're going to thank me. [ then everything around them could act as some sort of reminder... or that's what he'd like to believe at least. ]
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[ makes a noncommittal noise... is rafayel well-behaved... hm... well....
but tobari just frowns at the idea ]
I'd remember you. [ baseless confidence that even if he forgot everything else, he'd still remember rafayel. ] But you could give me anything and I'd hold onto it. You don't need to make it expensive.
[ tobari would keep seashells or small cards or anything at all. ]
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But they last longer...? Besides, the more wasteful you think it is, maybe that bitterness will follow you even when we're born again? [ why is he treating tobari like he'd be a spiteful apparition... in reality, that would be more like raf.
but, he belatedly feels like his statement felt a bit too intense for the moment and so he downplays it by touching the side of tobari's neck. he pads along the side where his pulse is, then he places his fingers against his adam's apple, staring at it for a moment before looking away. ]
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so tobari just brings up a hand to lightly catch the one that had grazed over his neck, lifting rafayel's hand so that tobari can press his lips lightly against those wandering fingertips. almost as if trying to answer what was left unsaid. ]
Sometimes you do drive me slightly crazy. [ he'll admit to that. rafayel ragebaits tobari on purpose and he gets caught every time. ] But I think in our next life, it'll be everything else you make me feel that'll drive me to you.
And if that fails, we can say I'll find you out of spite.
[ he turns rafayel's hand over in his hold, pressing another kiss to his palm before lowering it ]
Sound good?
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rafayel isn't afraid of spilling his secrets, or showcasing his vulnerabilities. but, he was scared of tobari coming to hate who he actually was. or if he'd wake up one day and decided he couldn't handle the weight of rafayel's feelings. no matter how much reassurance he's received, he isn't sure if these thoughts of his would ever change.
... and he feels it stronger with every second. even knowing that he brought tobari here specifically for the purpose of sharing his world with him, it hasn't been easy. it's why it felt a little dishonest to accept tobari's heartfelt words. they read like a confession, and while it makes his heart flutter, it also burns him in the same breath. he inhales tightly at the feel of tobari's warmth on his fingertips, and his fingers curl instinctively, holding onto his hand. ]
As much as I look forward to your spite, I do have one complaint. [ ... ]
You're already making me sound like a troublemaker again.
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still, tobari will let his free hand slip to the back of rafayel's neck to encourage him down for a kiss anyway. when tobari pulls back, his expression softens into something fond. ]
But you're my troublemaker. So don't get so lost in your thoughts... but if you do, I'll just pull you back to me again.
[ and he'll press a kiss to rafayel's left cheek, right cheek, and linger briefly to nose at his jawline—a little overly affectionate, but still determined to not let this feeling of melancholy win ]
Let's go to dinner?
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he finishes putting on his belt, before he ends up grabbing tobari's hand and heading out the door. he'd make a joke about tobari will need to eat to survive the next day, but he inwardly realizes... that's probably not very funny, and so he doesn't end up saying it.
...
they can hail a taxi there, i guess, since they may just be running late to their reservation.
the restaurant is a both quaint and upscale at the same time, almost carrying a more rustic vibe. while the menu is limited, the dishes they bring out are nothing short of beautiful; the seafood not only fresh, but incredibly well-seasoned and balanced.
but, maybe what sticks out more than the food is its owners. for one, it's probably the first time rafayel has been called with such familiarity by other people in a public capacity. they seem keen on treating rafayel like he's an overgrown kid, including calling him "lil raf." which is cursed because it only makes me think of that quiz...
that's not the most attractive, though, and so he's definitely looking for the first indication that tobari is done with his food so they can finally leave.
he even presses his foot on top of tobari's under the dinner table to drive that point.
why did i fast forward to here specifically ]
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tobari might've finished his food, but raf's eagerness to leave has him feeling contrary. after the tap to his foot, he instead lifts it to let it drag lightly against rafayel's calf before hooking around his ankle. footsie. ]
What, we can't get dessert?
[ he supposes they can find another spot somewhere nearby but... this is fun for him?
lol
lmao ]
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which is likely why, rafayel appears to be awkwardly trying to combat their embarrassing stories by waving them off. though, after the fifth or sixth time of doing this, he is definitely being worn down. if there's one consolation, it's in the fact that tobari seems to be enjoying himself. there isn't a lot he wouldn't endure to see him smile.
... and maybe the feeling of tobari's foot against his ankle. he tries not to show he's startled. he clear his throat, before trying to shake tobari's foot off. shifting his position a little, he tries to trap tobari's foot between his feet. ] If you keep this up, there won't be dessert from here or anywhere.
[ is this sulking, or is this... [redacted] ]
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