[ HELP, it's true, but rafayel remains willfully ignorant of that fact.
just like how tobari doesn't notice the way in which he's been (poorly attempting) to give him the cold shoulder throughout the shoot. ironically enough, it probably started out as a joke just to get tobari's attention, and yet... as time passed and he didn't actually notice him at all (????), it swiftly grew into being Real.
while the shoot is... fun, he can't deny that since he loves amusement parks (thanks tobari, but not right now), he can't deny thinking a few times during this shoot that it would have been a lot better if tobari was next to him instead. look, he can yearn and be angy at the same time.
that said, after he's done thanking the staff individually, he moves to grab some of his stuff he left earlier in the tent. once he returns, he does see tobari waiting there, and he ... fights the urge to wave him down. instead, as soon as they make eye contact, he's already walking towards the car by himself.
except, once he gets to the door, he realizes he doesn't have the keys...
[ help!!!! honestly tobari is pretty fond watching rafayel properly mind his manners and thank everyone individually... he's waiting but in no particular rush to leave—which makes rafayel heading immediately for the car confuse him a bit? he tilts his head but follows after with the giant bear tucked under his arm, frowning as he wonders what could be causing the mood...
when they make it to the car, he'll just raise a hand up to fuss with rafayel's hair, arranging strands back into place as he looks over his face for any signs of exhaustion. ]
Good job. Tired? [ if he's so quiet... ] I brought spare clothes if you wanted to get something to eat now that the shoot's done... but if you'd rather nap, I can drop you off at yours and then grab the food to bring back.
[ even when rafayel is mildly annoyed, he doesn't brush tobari off. instead, he remains rightfully in place, he leans leans down just as little to make it easier for tobari to see, especially since they did add some stick, shiny strands through his hair to create more dimension and highlight.
he tilts his head slightly at the question, but easily looks away once tobari is done. ] Not really. But, yeah, I'll head home first. You don't have to worry about food. I'll order in later. [ he does hold his hand out to take the bear again though since his arms look full.
also, that's his buddy to complain to... while he thinks tobari is a fool. ]
[ he asks openly as he hands the bear over to rafayel, and then also opens the door for him to enter the car… once he’s seated, then tobari will also hand him the rest of the fan gifts…
and then he will also slide into the backseat and close the door behind him so they can talk this out before he drives ]
[ rafayel tucks the bear under his arm as he takes a seat in the back. he's already buckling up quietly as he holds the bear in his arms. only once tobari sits in the back with him does he gradually peek over at him through his peripherals. ]
... You woke up early, we should just get going. [ he offers quietly at first.
though, he is visibly warming up just a little now that tobari is here. ]
[ but, he reaches over and holds the teddy bear's hand out towards tobari. ]
But, you don't think you're worrying about the wrong thing? Instead of thinking someone is bothering me, you should be considering ways to cheer me up? [ why is tobari allowing this... ]
[ he looks at tobari's hand in which holds the bear's paws so delicately.
he tries not to break the seriousness of his own expression, however. ] ... That might be impossible. [ can he always ensure tobari will always keep his eyes on him? it seemed like an extreme demand even to him. he knows he has no reason to kick up such a fuss and yet.
so he decides to start this off a little differently. ]
[ he's not sure where this is going... he's trying to recall the photoshoot itself? did tobari miss some kind of cue from rafayel that he was uncomfortable? ]
The concept suited you well and you were polite to everyone on set. You took direction well, which made everything go smoothly. I think the director was pleased too, from our conversation.
he's quiet for a moment, before— ] So you were watching me? It didn't seem like it. You barely made eye contact, you didn't even try and approach me after the shoot, and you probably already forgot we were supposed to spend allll night together.
I was checking the gifts to make sure no one sent you anything insane. But of course I watch you—I always watch you. I still have to make sure that nothing weird or unsafe happens?
You and I both had to thank the staff, but then you avoided me at the tent where I was waiting for you? I offered to get you food because I knew we'd spend the evening together.
What the hell!
[ oKAY SO OBVIOUSLY HE DOESN'T THINK THIS TANTRUM IS VALID ]
[ he looks off to the side. ] I mean, part of why I worked so hard today was so that we could all finish early. [ he was looking forward to them spending time together... or so he seems to be implying as he's now grabbing the bear away from tobari like it's their child in the middle of their messy divorce. ]
[ rebuttals come easier to him. maybe that's why he's reflexively about to say something, but he stops short when he hears tobari's last words. he struggles top open his mouth for a second, but he does end up unbuckling his seatbelt and just leaning forward and against tobari's shoulder. ]
... I don't believe you. [ but, he does feel a little better.
despite the cautious way in which he's approached their relationship, it's true that he's recently been wanting to be a little closer. maybe all of this just really stemmed from his own insecurities. he can't help but wonder if tobari is dating him out of pity, or out of some weird sense of obligation (or worse, that they're not even dating at all... but he doesn't even think this is a possibility help). he knows they're bound by their professional relationship, and he's understanding of the fact that he can't exactly vocalize what they are to each other to the rest of the world, but in moments like this...
well, who doesn't want to be spoiled by their boyfriend? ] But, keep your eyes on me. I'm going to do all I can so you can enter an early retirement. So you have to do everything I want tonight.
[ . . . jeeze. tobari sighs, but doesn't shift away when rafayel leans forward and onto him. he shifts to make it easier for them to fit against each other, which surely only adds to how misleading this all is, but tobari just thinks that rafayel must be feeling especially needy... maybe he's anxious and demanding since their schedule is about to get insane with the comeback...
his hand comes up anyway, gently carding through rafayel's hair to try to soothe him. he just fixed it, and he'll have to fix it again before rafayel goes on live later today, but he'll deal with that when it comes... ]
I don't think I agreed to any of that... [ tobari has no idea what he'd do in retirement. go crazy, probably. but he understands the sentiment of what rafayel is asking so, ] Okay, okay. Get all your neediness out since there won't be room in the schedule for a while.
[ fair warning.... but also he frowns a bit as he feels like he has to say again, ]
... I know you work hard, Raf. I just want you to enjoy at least part of it while you're doing it. So don't push yourself too much. If there's ever something you hate, just tell me, and you won't have to do it. Even as much as I watch you, I can't read your mind, alright?
[ oh... is tobari holding him? he blinks, almost confused at first, but then he settles into his touch. he rests his chin on tobari's shoulder, and wraps his arms around him.
since they're so close, his voice naturally gets a little lower and quieter. ] I used to hate most of this stuff, but lately I've been having fun, and I think it's thanks to you. I didn't really think there was anything beyond the music itself...
[ but sometimes it's fun to perform. it was like an added element to his craft.
that said, he does pull away a little, just to kiss tobari on the cheek. it's so gently though, it could have just been the flutter of his hair. but, he's grateful he has someone who cares about him this much. ] But, I think sometimes I just really need this.
[ reassurance... except, it's not what he thinks it is at all. ]
[ what a big baby... tobari sighs, bringing his arms up to just give rafayel a hug entirely then. there's a slight grumble when the kiss comes—was it a kiss? he's not sure but it felt like an overly affectionate gesture that bordered on inappropriate. still, it's hard for him to impose distance with rafayel when he's already so moody and fragile... ]
... well, you're at your best when it's just you and the music. But this way, more people can hear it.
[ the things they have to do to promo the main event. commercials, lives, promo, fanservice... tobari is of the opinion that's how you get people in the door, but it's always raf's talent that gets them to stay rooted in place. ]
You can take a second whenever you want, though. [ the one thing tobari always hates is overworking the idols. even if a schedule is packed, it can still have just enough breathing room to not feel like a pressure chamber. ] So remember to use your words.
[ instead of throwing a fit that tobari can't figure out... they have time today but he's like this'd be such a mess for them both if they were busier ]
[ the lack of imposed distance... surely, that won't come back to bite him in the ass.
even with the slight grumble he hears so close to ears, he's still pleased that tobari hasn't pushed him away. instead, he remains in his arms, and somehow... it feels incredibly warm and comfortable to be there. eventually, he does untangle himself from tobari, if just to nod his head. ] You better not regret saying that.
I'm going to complain looots from now on. Especially, if I have to hit the gym as much as I did for this comeback. [ he's pretty sure running on the treadmill is 100% some form of torture. ... maybe tobari is into that. ]
[ except he wants to go home already and he's hungry so
he'll reach out with his other hand to catch rafayel by the hip, pulling him closer to tobari so he's sitting more toward his side on the backseat. then he'll use the hand on rafayel's abdomen to push him down so he's laying flat against the seat and tobari is hovering above him ]
This is harassment. Now let go.
[ thinking about how it's good the windows to this car are all completely tinted ]
for a moment, rafayel seems to go along with it, if just because he's being horribly misled. part of him (wrongly and inaccurately) believed this was tobari's way of giving in. soon he'd touch his abs and have no choice but to admit his body was better than yori's—
instead, he'd pushed on his back and he's stuck looking at tobari from underneath him. he blinks a few times. had they done this before, rafayel may have been more smug as opposed to...
he releases a sigh as he lets go of tobari, instead resting his hand on his leg. ]
... It's not harassment if I allow it. [ even if he might threaten to call someone the second tobari does. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
just like how tobari doesn't notice the way in which he's been (poorly attempting) to give him the cold shoulder throughout the shoot. ironically enough, it probably started out as a joke just to get tobari's attention, and yet... as time passed and he didn't actually notice him at all (????), it swiftly grew into being Real.
while the shoot is... fun, he can't deny that since he loves amusement parks (thanks tobari, but not right now), he can't deny thinking a few times during this shoot that it would have been a lot better if tobari was next to him instead. look, he can yearn and be angy at the same time.
that said, after he's done thanking the staff individually, he moves to grab some of his stuff he left earlier in the tent. once he returns, he does see tobari waiting there, and he ... fights the urge to wave him down. instead, as soon as they make eye contact, he's already walking towards the car by himself.
except, once he gets to the door, he realizes he doesn't have the keys...
indignantly crosses his arms outside the car. ]
no subject
when they make it to the car, he'll just raise a hand up to fuss with rafayel's hair, arranging strands back into place as he looks over his face for any signs of exhaustion. ]
Good job. Tired? [ if he's so quiet... ] I brought spare clothes if you wanted to get something to eat now that the shoot's done... but if you'd rather nap, I can drop you off at yours and then grab the food to bring back.
[ he's so unaware of rafayel's tantrum ]
no subject
he tilts his head slightly at the question, but easily looks away once tobari is done. ] Not really. But, yeah, I'll head home first. You don't have to worry about food. I'll order in later. [ he does hold his hand out to take the bear again though since his arms look full.
also, that's his buddy to complain to... while he thinks tobari is a fool. ]
no subject
… what did I do?
[ he asks openly as he hands the bear over to rafayel, and then also opens the door for him to enter the car… once he’s seated, then tobari will also hand him the rest of the fan gifts…
and then he will also slide into the backseat and close the door behind him so they can talk this out before he drives ]
no subject
... You woke up early, we should just get going. [ he offers quietly at first.
though, he is visibly warming up just a little now that tobari is here. ]
no subject
Nah. I’m doing fine.
And even if I was tired, I can take a second to ask what’s going on if something’s bothering you. Or someone?
Can you tell me what I did, or should I start figuring it out?
[ since he can assume that sometimes rafayel wants to make him work for it ]
no subject
[ but, he reaches over and holds the teddy bear's hand out towards tobari. ]
But, you don't think you're worrying about the wrong thing? Instead of thinking someone is bothering me, you should be considering ways to cheer me up? [ why is tobari allowing this... ]
no subject
I can… but I’d still want to know what I did to upset you so I don’t do it again.
[ if it’s fair. if it’s not fair then… well he can take it into consideration just for the sake of being receptive to rafayel’s feelings ]
no subject
he tries not to break the seriousness of his own expression, however. ] ... That might be impossible. [ can he always ensure tobari will always keep his eyes on him? it seemed like an extreme demand even to him. he knows he has no reason to kick up such a fuss and yet.
so he decides to start this off a little differently. ]
How did you think I did today?
no subject
[ he's not sure where this is going... he's trying to recall the photoshoot itself? did tobari miss some kind of cue from rafayel that he was uncomfortable? ]
The concept suited you well and you were polite to everyone on set. You took direction well, which made everything go smoothly. I think the director was pleased too, from our conversation.
no subject
...
he's quiet for a moment, before— ] So you were watching me? It didn't seem like it. You barely made eye contact, you didn't even try and approach me after the shoot, and you probably already forgot we were supposed to spend allll night together.
no subject
I was checking the gifts to make sure no one sent you anything insane. But of course I watch you—I always watch you. I still have to make sure that nothing weird or unsafe happens?
You and I both had to thank the staff, but then you avoided me at the tent where I was waiting for you? I offered to get you food because I knew we'd spend the evening together.
What the hell!
[ oKAY SO OBVIOUSLY HE DOESN'T THINK THIS TANTRUM IS VALID ]
no subject
[ he looks off to the side. ] I mean, part of why I worked so hard today was so that we could all finish early. [ he was looking forward to them spending time together... or so he seems to be implying as he's now grabbing the bear away from tobari like it's their child in the middle of their messy divorce. ]
Was I the only one who was excited?
no subject
reaches over to pinch rafayel's cheek to scold him ]
Don't call doing my job excuses.
[ SIGHS ]
You did well then... [ to make the shoot resolve early ] but of course I'm glad you'd get a chance to rest before we start getting busier tomorrow.
Did you think I wasn't paying attention to you...? Raf, I'm always paying attention to you. I don't know how to not notice you anymore.
[ in a mysteriously platonic way, it feels like rafayel's at the center of tobari's universe most days. ]
no subject
... I don't believe you. [ but, he does feel a little better.
despite the cautious way in which he's approached their relationship, it's true that he's recently been wanting to be a little closer. maybe all of this just really stemmed from his own insecurities. he can't help but wonder if tobari is dating him out of pity, or out of some weird sense of obligation (or worse, that they're not even dating at all... but he doesn't even think this is a possibility help). he knows they're bound by their professional relationship, and he's understanding of the fact that he can't exactly vocalize what they are to each other to the rest of the world, but in moments like this...
well, who doesn't want to be spoiled by their boyfriend? ] But, keep your eyes on me. I'm going to do all I can so you can enter an early retirement. So you have to do everything I want tonight.
no subject
his hand comes up anyway, gently carding through rafayel's hair to try to soothe him. he just fixed it, and he'll have to fix it again before rafayel goes on live later today, but he'll deal with that when it comes... ]
I don't think I agreed to any of that... [ tobari has no idea what he'd do in retirement. go crazy, probably. but he understands the sentiment of what rafayel is asking so, ] Okay, okay. Get all your neediness out since there won't be room in the schedule for a while.
[ fair warning.... but also he frowns a bit as he feels like he has to say again, ]
... I know you work hard, Raf. I just want you to enjoy at least part of it while you're doing it. So don't push yourself too much. If there's ever something you hate, just tell me, and you won't have to do it. Even as much as I watch you, I can't read your mind, alright?
no subject
since they're so close, his voice naturally gets a little lower and quieter. ] I used to hate most of this stuff, but lately I've been having fun, and I think it's thanks to you. I didn't really think there was anything beyond the music itself...
[ but sometimes it's fun to perform. it was like an added element to his craft.
that said, he does pull away a little, just to kiss tobari on the cheek. it's so gently though, it could have just been the flutter of his hair. but, he's grateful he has someone who cares about him this much. ] But, I think sometimes I just really need this.
[ reassurance... except, it's not what he thinks it is at all. ]
no subject
... well, you're at your best when it's just you and the music. But this way, more people can hear it.
[ the things they have to do to promo the main event. commercials, lives, promo, fanservice... tobari is of the opinion that's how you get people in the door, but it's always raf's talent that gets them to stay rooted in place. ]
You can take a second whenever you want, though. [ the one thing tobari always hates is overworking the idols. even if a schedule is packed, it can still have just enough breathing room to not feel like a pressure chamber. ] So remember to use your words.
[ instead of throwing a fit that tobari can't figure out... they have time today but he's like this'd be such a mess for them both if they were busier ]
no subject
even with the slight grumble he hears so close to ears, he's still pleased that tobari hasn't pushed him away. instead, he remains in his arms, and somehow... it feels incredibly warm and comfortable to be there. eventually, he does untangle himself from tobari, if just to nod his head. ] You better not regret saying that.
I'm going to complain looots from now on. Especially, if I have to hit the gym as much as I did for this comeback. [ he's pretty sure running on the treadmill is 100% some form of torture. ... maybe tobari is into that. ]
no subject
If you're trying to do more suggestive shoots, you'll probably have to be at the gym plenty... That's a lot of skin, you know?
[ all this to what? compete with yori? horrible. tobari just frowns and pulls back once rafayel's hair is fully immaculate ]
The only thing you have left today is to go live... so you can do that when we're driving back or while I'm ordering food. Up to you.
no subject
excuse him??? ] Heeeello! I have abs?
[ he's already beginning to pull up his shirt. he grabs tobari's hand and draws it closer until his palms are flat against his body. ] See, feel them!
[ forget about the live!!! this is more important!!
will his hair end up a mess again... stay tuned. ]
no subject
ALREADY TRYING TO PULL HIS HAND BACK ]
Can you stop harassing me.
[ they just had a sweet and tender moment and it immediately devolves into stupidity again ]
no subject
not them wrestling in the car ]
You have to really look and feel or I'm not moving!
no subject
Nothing about me started harassing you.
[ except he wants to go home already and he's hungry so
he'll reach out with his other hand to catch rafayel by the hip, pulling him closer to tobari so he's sitting more toward his side on the backseat. then he'll use the hand on rafayel's abdomen to push him down so he's laying flat against the seat and tobari is hovering above him ]
This is harassment. Now let go.
[ thinking about how it's good the windows to this car are all completely tinted ]
no subject
for a moment, rafayel seems to go along with it, if just because he's being horribly misled. part of him (wrongly and inaccurately) believed this was tobari's way of giving in. soon he'd touch his abs and have no choice but to admit his body was better than yori's—
instead, he'd pushed on his back and he's stuck looking at tobari from underneath him. he blinks a few times. had they done this before, rafayel may have been more smug as opposed to...
he releases a sigh as he lets go of tobari, instead resting his hand on his leg. ]
... It's not harassment if I allow it. [ even if he might threaten to call someone the second tobari does. ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
1/2
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)