glub | ( 🍓🧀 )

[ the statement gets a brief glance over, before rafayel tries to focus on the sights around him. not as much in an act of dismissing him, but more in a way of respecting his admittance. though, that doesn't necessarily stop him from speaking his mind, either. ]

I don't think she felt that way. [ it's a loose statement. rafayel understands his words painfully well. even as it currently stands, can he say he doesn't come without baggage and burdens? that he doesn't also carry on the will of a world miss bodyguard knows nothing about? it's a brief thought that crosses his mind before: ]

I think it is, but maybe you're just not allowing yourself to think so. Then again, solutions tend to be easy, but the resolve behind them are the hard part. [ said with a shrug. he keeps his voice even, almost distant as if to mimic tobari's prior tone. ] But, if that's the way you feel...

[ he respects those decisions. ... that's all they can do.

even when he knows how it ends, is it wrong to want to be with someone in spite of it? ]

[ ... in the end, he always lacks resolve. too kind to be a terrorist, too adamant to be a bystander. rafayel's probably right. if tobari really thought it was worth it, he could cross this gap—but given what a mess of a person he still feels like he is, how could he impose that on hinagiku? she loves him anyway. he knows that. he loves her, too.

and yet he really thinks she could do so much better, and every decision he's made here has been pushing her to that instead. it's arrogant of him to choose for her, but he does it anyway. ]

... it's the coward's way out. [ tobari has his own reasons. every single one of them sounds like an excuse. ] I can call it that.

But as long as she can be happy and safe—I'll always choose that future.

[ even if he's not a part of it ]

[ he doesn't agree nor disagree. perhaps, in some distant past, he may have made a similar decision. who can say. but, what he does know and have conviction for is that tobari's decisions were often intended for someone else. even if, it does make rafayel wonder if he knows how painful that might be for the other person. there is no deeper pain than being left behind, or waiting indefinitely for something or someone that may never come.

it's a deeper cruelty in a sense, and yet, it may be a choice tobari always makes.

not unlike the way he would sooner use the vial on suzune, even if it meant she would live in a cruel world without him. ]

Happy and safe... [ he closes his eyes and just nods. ] I hope that for their future. But, you should also remember that you should striving to be happy too, or it might feel like it's all for naught. As much as you want others to have that... you don't think they think the same for you?

[ . . . ]

People have to keep going. I won’t be around forever.

[ he won’t even be around a normal amount of time. it’s another argument he would’ve posed against rafayel giving him the vial, but it’s already a moot point. people can want well for tobari and he can appreciate it, but how worth it can it be when he’s only got a few years left?

it’s easier to focus on people with real futures. ]

I appreciate that kindness. I wouldn’t be here without it. It’s not like I’m against my own happiness… but I’m easy to please as long as the people I care about are taken care of anyway.

[ NOT THE FEW YEARS LEFT!!!!!!!!

thank god for doctor zayne ]

That may be true, but isn't it nice to extend that time by however long it can be...? [ he knows the complexity of any promise, but all the more when it was a promise of time. he doesn't pretend to comprehend what state tobari is in, but... ]

Then do us all a favor and try not to assume what we want either, yeah? If you really want to know what someone wants, you can always ask. [ ... and maybe their desires are also just as simple.

simple enough where rafayel makes the mistake of using the word "us." was that too straightforward? ]

[ zayne really is tasked with keeping tobari together with duct tape and prayer. but tobari looks thoughtful at the first question... he's really not going to tell rafayel right now of all times that he is dying. in all honesty, he's not sure when he'll tell him. later? maybe it'll come up but hopefully not too soon.

instead he focuses on the sentiment of 'us'.

it carries an implication that tobari also still isn't ready to address, because he's not sure how much he wants to shine a light on complicated, unsaid matters if rafayel is already entangled with someone else. tobari isn't selfish enough to get himself involved or make things harder.

... so he'll address the other piece that he thinks is just as important— ]

If all goes well, then I'll have a life again. I'm not ignorant of the fact that I'd owe that to you.

... so you don't have to worry about me wandering off and cutting ties, or abandoning you. I already know that, even at least in part, my life is in your hands.

If you ever want to get rid of me, it'd have to be by your own hand.

[ and tobari would accept that too—but he's not self-deprecating or out of touch enough to think such a thing is likely after all the trouble rafayel has already gone to keeping him ]

[ zayne can handle it. master of fate... a god... there's no excuse for not keeping tobari alive. says i, bijou.

that said, he still can't help but fall dead silent at tobari's declaration. he isn't sure why it makes him feel a little off. he isn't sure if it's mild hurt he feels or something else? he doesn't want tobari to think of it as him owing him as much as it is... ]

... Did I seem worried about that? [ he says gently, and it's clear by his tone that it isn't an actual question. before he can receive an answer, he's already moving on. ] A little dramatic, don'tchathink? I won't abandon you, either. Since I asked you come with, I plan to keep that promise.

In a world where promises are constantly broken, I should at least keep mine.

[ he says as he tilts his chin as he holds his pinky up. more so he does it symbolically, as opposed to actually expecting a pinky promise. ]

You don’t think giving someone a second chance at life is dramatic? Even the way you did it was a lot.

[ he has to fucking say it. why did rafayel have to kiss him about it. (well. ok he can guess.)

… but even if rafayel only means the gesture symbolically, tobari will still reach out to link their fingers together. ]

… whatever time I have left is yours.

[ in another world and time when things go right, tobari says a version of these words to hinagiku and he means it entirely romantically. here, now, his feelings are less clear—but he means it nonetheless. he already said he can imagine that both raf and suzune will keep him busy, and he doesn’t really think he’ll have time to even focus on anyone else once they get out of here.

he also finds that he… doesn’t really want to anyway. ]

[ that... remark definitely shuts rafayel up.

no, he almost coughs because he feels his own saliva get caught in his throat.

he purses his lips together briefly, his eyes purposely directed elsewhere. he doesn't re-establish that eye contact, even as tobari continues. he doesn't regret it so he's not about to apologize for it, but it didn't mean he didn't see it as a breach of boundaries. it wasn't mutually exclusive, but rafayel is prideful enough not to touch the topic, especially knowing how they both had people they were already deeply involved with.

when the finger loops around his, his pinky also comes to give tobari's a little squeeze. ]

Good. No one else could handle you but me, anyway. Troublemaker.

[ says him... ]

[ ? ]

Rich, coming from you.

[ but he won’t argue past it. instead he’ll just let go of rafayel’s pinky and rise to his feet. ]

Do what you need. I’ll just check on Suzune.

[ she’s obviously fine but it’s been a part of his routine everyday since they could see the eurydice. morning and night, just checking on his sister. ]

[ he will allow her to go check, and in the meantime, he will also commit to checking on his own eurydice who awaits him in the same field. the one who had probably left him behind yet again, and will likely continue to do so.

...

is this days later now? who knows how they've spent their last couple of days here. what he does know is that he makes no explicit fanfare of letting the sea god's bride go. she would return to her world, not unlike the way the hunter had returned to the light of the "surface world" where she belonged. but, even through time and space, even through the other people she would inevitably meet and perhaps be drawn to like clockwork— he knows their bond is everlasting. maybe that's what makes it easier to accept.

it still leaves him feeling deeply emotional, and yet... he still keeps his composure through it all, even when he meets with tobari. he might seem a little more somber than usual, but it picks back up when he sees tobari isn't alone, either.

hi, i'm here to continue this. let me see suzune... ]

[ tobari was there when the last grain of sand ran out. some part of him still couldn’t quite believe it—a chance to see his sister again, to hold onto her safe and whole when the last he’d seen of her was nothing more than a charred corpse. when he hugs her, she’s startled—but ends up crying all the same. just a few tears, after which she whaps him for making her mess up her makeup. tobari has laughed a few times now in purgatory… but this is the first time the sound is so free.

so he catches her up on a few things, making sure she drinks her own vial as soon as possible, and briefly explains what comes next. he glances in the direction of someone approaching, but before he can even get a word out, suzune is rushing ahead in all her flowing silks and graceful steps. ]

Are you Mister Rafayel…? Thank you so much for looking after Tobari!

[ she’ll bow deeply at the waist, head lowered as she continues to fret ]

I can only imagine how much trouble he inevitably caused you! Please accept my apology for his horrible personality!

[ tobari, in the back minding his own business: horrible????? ]

[ perhaps, it's good timing on rafayel's part. he's glad they were allowed the privacy of their reunion, and he can see by their body language that they're just as close as he believed them to be. it's heart-warming in a way that's kind of comforting, especially with the melancholy that still lingers within him. thankfully, the sudden greeting quickly disperses some of it, and he can barely hold back the desire to laugh.

sweet siblings... ] It's nice to meet you, Suzune. Tobari has talked a lot about you. It looks like you're just as lovely of a person as he's mentioned. [ there's a smile on his lips as he speaks almost like one might speak to someone's mother-in-law. there's a certain formality there, but also... a tinge of humor. ]

But, there's no need to apologize. Despite his sharp remarks, he has also helped me out a lot as well.

[ doesn't refute horrible... because it's just too funny. ]

[ … okay… there’s obviously no trust in this sibling relationship because suzune straightens up to look behind her to where tobari is, who specifically times that moment to look away. who said anything about her. not him.

but she’ll face rafayel again and look just so cutely befuddled ]

… please don’t believe anything Tobari has said about me. I don’t think he’s a trusted source about anyone. [ VICIOUS ] But that’s very kind of you, Mister Rafayel. I’m so very happy to make your acquaintance too. You don’t need to make excuses for Tobari’s sharp tongue. He causes trouble wherever he goes because he can’t help himself…

You make it sound so bad.

[ he says this but he’s also not inherently disagreeing ]

Anyway, the two of you don’t really need to be so formal with each other, especially if we’re heading to the same place.

Having manners isn’t optional for some of us, Tobari!

I promise they're all good things. [ he says with a soft sort of chuckle. there's something gentle to his voice, like he was endeared by their exchange. ] But, I think Tobari may have... about half a point there. While manners are important, I'd also like if you weren't so formal with me.

I haven't known Tobari for very long, but I plan on taking as much responsibility as I can. [ he gives a wink. ] I do modest work, but it shouldn't pose a problem for your lifestyle. Whatever it is you'd like to do, I believe I can provide you with enough support. [ he's very much downplaying the fact that he has a decent amount of money. at the very least, he'll see to it that they want for nothing if they're coming with him.

he hasn't really dropped the formality, but listen... this is tobari's family, of course he's a little nervous.

but, also why did this keep reminding me of when they introduce themselves.... jumps off a cliff ]

[ what the heck......................... suzune blinks for a few moments, visibly stunned. in part because it's rare that they're given such kindness, but also she definitely wasn't expecting to be taken care of to this extent in anyway. so she's quick to shake her head, hands waving in front of her ]

Oh—n-no, it's really alright, Mister Rafayel, we can take care of ourselves too, I promise! I've been able to take on work as a geisha and—I'm not sure if your home has the same but I'd work very hard to make sure we're not an imposition...

A-And Tobari's awful with nobles and can never watch himself and the only really redeeming thing about him is his looks, but he somehow ends up finding honest work anyway! [ SOMEHOW. she doesn't know about the terrorism. but she continues to fret, clasping her hands together in front of her ] You're so kind... This isn't the first time we've started from scratch so really, we can make ourselves useful too...

[ tobari will sigh then, stepping up so that he's next to suzune and nudging her lightly ]

We won't cause problems for him—but don't get all worked up about debts. [ that's for tobari to worry about, but he won't say it aloud after raf already scolded him over it ] Isn't there something else you're forgetting to say first?

Eh? Ah... that's right—mm, well, thank you, Mister Rafayel. More than anything... Thank you so much. I'm looking forward to knowing you better too...

[ he didn't expect the sudden reaction, and it almost makes him laugh. he tries not to, though. there's just an amused sort of smile. ] I see it runs in the family. [ speaking of debts and always worrying about not imposing on someone else. ]

But, I also know how hard it is to adjust to a new place. [ considering they're all probably calling land the "surface world," that's probably evidence enough that they're all relatively removed from what most would consider "normal." regardless, he gives a small shake of his head. ] Like Tobari said, there's nothing for you to worry about. I'm sure your brother will make himself useful with that face of his. He was pretty popular here too.

[ teasing... because he needs to bank on this now while he still can.

is it time to pat her on the head like a lads... since tobari won't accept it from him.

that said, he ends up just hovering his hand over her head, before withdrawing it awkwardly. ] Also, me too, Suzune. Thanks for coming back with me. [ he says in a way to dissolve some of the pressure she may still feel. ]

[ whether they're from the sea or the sky, they sure aren't from the surface... suzune is still much more obedient and darling than tobari, so she wasn't going to deny headpats—even when he pulls away before actually delivering, she just looks endeared. instead, she looks up at rafayel with such clear adoration in her eyes compared to the scathing glares she was directing at tobari ]

Eh... Tobari still managed to be popular...? I guess I shouldn't underestimate his charms, few as they are... [ but she does relax a little bit into a smile with rafayel's reassurance (and partially tobari's intervention). wah.... ] ... thank you very much for opening your home to us.

[ she says it a little more softly, betraying some of the emotions that she inevitably feels. as adaptable as she tries to be, this is still a lot to wake up to. ]

I think, even if he hasn't said it to you himself, Tobari is very fortunate to have met you. I know I feel very lucky already.

[ tobari just sighs next to her, grumbling a half-hearted 'oi' because he doesn't need a translator!! he's perfectly capable of communication! ]

[ tobari's face through all of this... really is just comedy gold. something for rafayel to reflect back on later.

for now, he also guesses it's a lot for any single person to take it. he decides they should also be more relaxed about it and take it in stride. hence, he also tries to relax his own posture, and be a little more at ease, as if to show her it's okay not to put on pretenses.

that said, his eyes to widen at her words as he blinks. ] I don't know about that.

[ but, he does appreciate her saying that. even now, he knows tobari may have forgiven him on paper, but it didn't mean he forgets his own crimes. regardless, of its results. ] But, I'll take your word for it. If he has any disagreements, he can save them for later.

I figure I can put out a suggestion box by the front door or something?

[ mournfully: ] He'd ignore it...

He's gotten so used to being in charge that he acts as though no rules apply to him... While I'm sure that he's able to do well with a certain crowd, I don't know how he's gotten to make and keep a friend like you, Mister Rafayel. You really must be so patient and forgiving to put up with him...

[ the absolute disbelief of tobari's expression when rafayel is described as PATIENT ]

Yeah, it is kinda of a toughie. I mean, there isn't anyone out there who doesn't get feelings hurt. But, I guess you could say I was born patient. [ he's going along with this, yeah. he's even going to smugly give tobari the side eye. ]

I mean, I still don't know if he'd consider me much of a friend.

[ WHAT

SHE GASPS AND WHIRLS TO GLARE AT TOBARI ]

Tobari! How emotionally inept can you be?!

What the fuck. Both of you.

[ ACCUSED OF POOR COMMUNICATION AND BEING SOCIALLY INEPT IN THE SAME MINUTE? he needs a second to recover ]

[ the gasp is taking me out...

the drama ensuing from this. rafayel is enjoying every second of it. even if— ] That's no way to speak to your sister, little one. [ going to try and ruffle tobari's hair, even if he hates it. or at least put an arm around him. ]

Keep your hand to yourself unless you want it broken.

[ he'd endure an arm around him but if rafayel tried to ruffle his hair for real he'd get his arm pinned behind his back ]

[ suzune just looks sooooooooo disappointed ]

Tobari, is it any wonder that people don't believe you have friends when you act this way...

[ SHE REALLY KEEPS SAYING WHATEVER SHE WANTS ABOUT HIM ]

[ funny you say that, because that's also how mc treats him... ]

You touched me a lot more than this before.

[ sorry he's doing this in front of god (suzune) and everyone...

that said, he does play it off easily enough. ] He has... friends?

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